The point I'm driving at here is that you shouldn't get too experimental if you're hoping to impress a new partner.
Neither you nor your partner is accustomed to the, ahem, ins and outs of how to comfortably maneuver in the new position and the result can be a bit awkward. The first couple of times that you try a new position can be a bit dicey. Practice Makes Perfect - A sense of humor and mutual patience in the first stages will go a long way toward softening the learning curve. So, it's clear that being good in bed means being familiar and, more importantly, comfortable with at least the most basic and common gay sex positions. Position affects a number of seriously important aspects of sex, from angle of penetration and range of motion to who has active control over the action. If you've ever raised your hips a bit and suddenly your top started making some serious noise or if you've ever just lifted your leg the tiniest bit and your bottom started to squeal with delight, you understand just how big an impact position has on the quality of your sex. A simple change in posture can mean the difference between hitting just the right spot and just hitting randomly. Remember that you are in control! Make his experience great and let him know that he’s not the only one expelling energy in the bedroom.Anyone who's ever had even half-way decent sex knows that position is everything. So, be creative, try new things and discover things that you never thought you (as a bottom) were capable of. You need to make sure that you are both satisfied and if things get boring in the bedroom, that is when tensions run high. Don’t be a push-over, let your partner know that you want to try something new or put a spin on something old. All too many bottoms feel that it’s not their place to make sexual suggestions. Learn your partner’s ticks and see how you can work with them.Ĥ) BE CREATIVE – Don’t be afraid to suggest a different position or try something kinky. So, use caution when proceeding with this suggestion.
If you don’t know what they are, then do not use this because then you might end up with him shooting and you still looking for the final blow yourself. This is really only a good idea if you intimately know the person you’re with and know his moans, groans and facial expressions.
This tends to be a shock to most tops, but none of them have complained so far!ģ) TEASE HIM! – So many tops like to tease their partners, so why not return the exotic pleasure of a good tease? When you see or hear or feel that your partner is getting ready to shoot his wad, pull back or up depending on the position and force his member out of you. This will let him know that you are enjoying it and want to participate more. Slowly push yourself toward him while he is inside you. I have found that when you are in almost any position but especially when you are in the missionary position, all you need to do is use your own strength. It gives you both more of a sensual experience.Ģ) WORK IT! – Even though it doesn’t seem like you are in complete control, you are! It is you who decides when enough is enough and ultimately you who controls his pleasure. Something so simple can make a very big difference and it’s never a bad idea to slow it down by doing either of these two things. And when he goes to insert his member, push out slightly and then relax it as he enters you.
This can be a big help, especially when you’re with a big top. Tops usually pick up on this and start by lubing up a couple of fingers and working your hole a little bit.
Take his hand or a couple of his fingers and gently lead them up and down your crack to your anus. If you’re not relaxed, it will be rough when he enters you. When you’re both lubed up and ready to go, ask him to relax you. I disagree and the following is a list of things to try as a bottom.ġ) GETTING HIS PENIS IN YOU – The first thing you need to know as a bottom, is that it does not have to hurt going in and your partner should not have to wince while trying to get it in. All too often, bottoms just lie there and take it, but they don’t really participate because they don’t think that there is anything they can do.
He writes:Īlthough I don’t like the labels of ‘top’ and ‘bottom’ and I believe that every gay man should experience being both, I myself prefer to bottom. Andy in New York has sent us in this piece about what the bottom can do to help make sex better.